The Story We Don’t Tell About Confidence as Women in Leadership

I sat across from a client—a brilliant, accomplished woman, running a successful business—and she looked me straight in the eye and said, “I just don’t think I can do this”

She had spent over a decade building her career, creating a business, mentoring others, and driving results. Yet here she was, questioning if she had what it took for this success.

“I thought by now I’d feel more confident,” she admitted. “But I still have moments where I wonder if I’m really the right person for this.”

Sound familiar?

Here’s the truth: self-doubt doesn’t disappear when you reach a certain level of success.

In fact, the higher you climb, the more you’re likely to feel it. But the problem isn’t the doubt itself—it’s how we respond to it.

We’ve been conditioned to believe that strong, confident leaders don’t hesitate. That they step into the room knowing they belong. That they never second-guess themselves.But that’s not reality.

Even the most successful female leaders—Oprah, Brené Brown, Michelle Obama—have openly spoken about their struggles with self-doubt.

Michelle Obama once admitted, “I still have a little imposter syndrome that never goes away.”

The difference? They didn’t wait for the doubt to disappear before taking action.

If you’ve ever thought…

 “If I were truly a strong leader, I wouldn’t feel this way.”

 “I need to be 100% sure before I take the next step.”

 “If I don’t feel confident, it must mean I’m not ready.”

…you’re not alone. But here’s what you need to know: Confidence isn’t the absence of doubt. Confidence is the decision to move forward anyway.

Reframing Self-Doubt: From Roadblock to Roadmap

Instead of seeing self-doubt as a barrier, what if you started seeing it as a signal?

Because here’s the thing: self-doubt often shows up when we’re growing.

It’s not proof that you’re failing—it’s proof that you’re stretching outside your comfort zone.

Think of self-doubt like a GPS.

• It points out obstacles, but it doesn’t mean you stop driving.
• It warns you when you’re in unfamiliar territory, but that’s where growth happens.
• It’s not there to paralyze you—it’s there to help you navigate forward.

So What Can You Do? 3 Steps to Redefine Confidence

Pause & Get Curious:

When self-doubt creeps in, instead of resisting it, ask: What is this doubt really trying to tell me?

Sometimes, it’s protecting you from past experiences. Other times, it’s just fear of the unknown. Either way, naming it reduces its power.

Separate Fear from Fact

Not every thought is true. Ask yourself: Is this self-doubt based on real evidence, or is it just my inner critic talking?

Remind yourself of times you succeeded despite uncertainty. That’s proof of your ability—not the absence of doubt.

Take Action Anyway

Confidence doesn’t come before action—it comes because of action. The fastest way to quiet self-doubt is to move forward despite it.

Every time you take action in the face of doubt, you rewire your brain to trust yourself more.

5 Reflection Questions to Shift Your Mindset

Next time self-doubt whispers in your ear, pause and ask yourself:

• What is this doubt actually trying to protect me from?

• Is there real evidence that I’m not capable, or is this just fear talking?

• If I wasn’t afraid of failing, what action would I take today?

• What’s one time in my life when I felt doubt and succeeded anyway?

• What advice would I give to a mentee who was feeling this way?

Because the truth is, you don’t have to be fearless to be powerful.You just have to trust yourself enough to act—even with the doubt.

If this resonates with you, I’d love to hear your thoughts. Have you ever taken action despite self-doubt? What helped you move forward? Drop a comment or share this with another woman in leadership who needs to hear it today.

Because you’re not alone in this. And you never have been.

Ready to Turn Reflection into Real Confidence in Leadership? 

If this reflection resonates and you’re eager to build your leadership authenticity with purpose, clarity, and confidence, I invite you to book a Leverage Session with me, and we’ll dive into:

• Reviewing your current leadership position to pinpoint whats working, and whats not.
• Defining your future vision and goals, identinfying the primary bottlenecks that are holding you back from stepping into your full leadership authenticity.
• Creating a personalised pathway to help you move forward confidently.

Click here to book your free Leverge Session.